Robot Monster (1953)
Cast: George Nader, Claudia Barrett, Selena Royle, George Barrows
Director: Phil Tucker
Synopsis: Post nuclear apocalypse where the last earthlings battle sex mad Robots!
Robot Monster is “One of the genuine legends of Hollywood” Maltin’s
“Marvellously incompetent” Creature Features
“Winner of the Golden Turkey Award for most ridiculous Monster in Screen History” Time Out
“a movie of such surpassing awfulness that it rivals Plan 9 as the worst ever” The Worst Movies of All Time
“Strong contender for the worst film ever made” Empire
As bizarre a film as has ever been created! This film arrived on DVD with the huge reputation of being the challenger to the throne currently occupied by Plan 9 From Outer Space as the worst film ever and it certainly comes close if not surpasses Plan 9 for sheer ineptitude.
The film has a mind boggling narrative involving futuristic alien beings set in a post nuclear world infested with giant prehistoric dinosaurs! One family has survived and appears rather oblivious to the plight of human civilization as they go about picnicking in what appears like a garbage dump. The family brat goes trundling off while the rest of the family have a picnic nap and finds an innocuous looking cave. Suddenly there is a flashing light and a giant dinosaur is unleashed from the sky to do battle with another monstrous beast while some highly sophisticated futuristic technology in the form of a cut price K-Mart music system and various antenna’s appear in front of the cave. There is also a chilling Doomsday device, which lets off killer bubbles into the atmosphere for a reason known only to the scriptwriter Wyatt Ordung!
From the dark cave emerges a most horrifying Robot Monster (played quite superbly by a rather overweight George Burrows) wearing a blow-dried gorilla suit with a fish tank head and antennas sticking out of it.
Ro-Man, as the Robot Monster is known is given the task by his leader, The Great Guidance, to discover the last remaining five or six humans and exterminate them with his lethal death rays. Unfortunately for the Robot Monster, our all-American family have had a dose of some brilliant antidote which protects them from death rays and even stale pretzels. So the poor blimp of a Robot Monster has to go bumbling around the wasteland trying to find the humans and physically beat them to death!
It’s a hapless task and even the seven-year-old brat takes the time to taunt the tubby Robot Monster and mocks him mercilessly calling him a “pooped-out pinwheel” among other things. The Robot Monster takes a shying to the brats elder sister and proceeds to stalk her and even tries to rip her bra off at one moment insisting that she accept him as the man in her life, if she has any desire to live any longer. Anyway there is much tension and horror along the way until the finally the director unleashes the most terrific twist in the plot and everything suddenly becomes as clear as day!
The film was shot in a revolutionary 2D and 3D process and the magnificent Doomsday bubble machine was provide by N.A Fisher Company just in case you were thinking of ordering your personal model. This film matches Plan 9 every step of the way, which is the very highest recommendation. Essential viewing for fans of cinematic turkeys the film is undoubtedly a classic of its kind. Apparently the poor director contemplated suicide after his masterpiece was ripped to shreds by callous critics and incidentally, the music score is composed by Academy Award winner Elmer Bernstein who must have been catapulted to stardom due to this effort.